We spend so much time grinding away at work that our own well-being can easily take a backseat. But let’s be real—you can’t keep running on empty. Without managing stress, burnout creeps in, motivation tanks, and even simple tasks start to feel overwhelming. Let’s talk about what self-care actually looks like and how you can integrate it into your daily life.
What Self-Care Is (and What It Isn’t)
Self-care is often mistaken for a luxury, like bubble baths, vacations, or treating yourself to something fancy. While those things can be nice, real self-care is about consistency. It’s about building habits that support your emotional, mental, and physical well-being. That might mean setting clear boundaries between work and personal life, doing something you actually enjoy (not just scrolling on your phone), or paying attention to how you talk to yourself. Small, intentional choices make a big difference over time.
Signs of Stress and Burnout
Burnout doesn’t hit all at once– it sneaks up gradually. A little stress is normal and can even be motivating, but if you’re noticing any of these signs, it’s time to reassess:
- Feeling emotionally drained or exhausted after work
- Increased irritability, cynicism, or detachment
- Trouble concentrating or making decisions
- Chronic fatigue, even after a full night’s sleep
- Frequent headaches, muscle tension, or stomach issues
- Trouble sleeping (either too much or too little)
- Procrastinating on emails, meetings, or work tasks
- Avoiding certain coworkers or dreading work altogether
- Struggling to disconnect from work thoughts after hours
- Feeling stuck, unmotivated, or questioning your career
One of the most eye-opening books on burnout is Trauma Stewardship by Laura van Dernoot Lipsky. While it’s geared toward helping professionals, the insights apply to anyone dealing with stress-heavy jobs. It helped me recognize my own warning signs and adjust before burnout took over.
Checking In With Yourself
It’s easy to keep pushing forward without stopping to check in, but a little self-reflection can go a long way in preventing burnout. If you’re feeling stretched thin, overwhelmed, or just off, these questions can help you figure out what needs to change:
- Am I practicing any of the self-care habits I tell others are important?
- Do I feel guilty when I take breaks or set boundaries?
- Am I dreading work, procrastinating, or zoning out more than usual?
- Do I actually have a manageable workload, or am I just pretending I do?
- How often do I check emails or think about work after hours?
- Do I have a solid way to decompress after work, or do I carry everything home with me?
- Do I still find meaning in my job, or does it just feel like a burden?
- Is my workplace supporting my well-being, or is it the main source of my stress?
- If a friend told me they were this stressed at work, what advice would I give them?
Listen to our interview with therapists about how they manage stress and burn-out:
Small Changes That Make a Big Difference
Managing work stress doesn’t require a complete life overhaul– small changes throughout the day can make a real impact. Here are some simple strategies:
Creating an After-Work Transition
Having a clear shift from work mode to personal time makes a huge difference. Whether it’s listening to music on the drive home, taking a walk, or changing into comfy clothes, these rituals signal to your brain that the workday is over. Without them, stress lingers, and it’s harder to unwind.
A therapist I know shared in a recent podcast episode that she mentally “clocked out” when she passed a specific road sign on her way home. It sounds small, but that act of intentionally leaving work stress behind made a difference. Find your version of that.
Self-Care at Work (Yes, It’s Possible)
Self-care isn’t just for after hours. Small moments during the workday—stretching, stepping outside, taking deep breaths—help maintain energy and focus. Instead of doomscrolling between tasks, try one of these:
- Deep breathing (box breathing: inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4)
- Progressive muscle relaxation (tense and release different muscle groups)
- Grounding techniques (use the 5-4-3-2-1 method to refocus on the present)
- Desk stretches (loosen up your neck, shoulders, and wrists)
- A short walk (even a quick lap around the office helps)
- Watching a funny video or sharing a joke with a coworker (I am totally guilty of watching a Nate Bargatze stand up show in between sessions before when in need of a “palate cleanser”)
- Organizing your workspace (a clutter-free desk always reduces mental clutter for me)
- Prioritizing tasks (use the Eisenhower Matrix to cut down on overwhelm)
- Taking a nap (if your job allows it, a quick power nap can work wonders)
During the podcast episode, Taylor added: “Sometimes we overcomplicate self-care. At its core, it’s about basic human needs—eating meals, sleeping, drinking water, moving your body. These things feel like givens, so we devalue them, but they’re essential. During my day, I make sure I have snacks, I drink water, and I pay attention to what I need between sessions. If I feel social, I chat with coworkers. If I need to decompress, I stretch or meditate.”
When Self-Care Means Finding a New Job
Not all burnout is personal—sometimes, it’s the work environment. If your job constantly demands more than you can give, lacks support, or makes you dread every Monday, no amount of deep breathing will fix that. In some cases, the best self-care decision is finding a workplace that actually values and supports your well-being.
Rethinking Work-Life Balance
When I was younger, I thought work-life balance meant hustling hard and then taking big vacations as a reward. Now, as a parent, it looks completely different. It’s not about sprinting until I can take time off, it’s about maintaining a sustainable rhythm every day so I can be present for my family and still do work I love.
For me, that means:
- Having firm work hours and actually sticking to them
- Not answering work emails on weekends or when I’m off
- Being intentional about the projects I take on
- Having coworkers I can lean on when needed
- Making sure my schedule works for my life, not the other way around
- Feeling supported by my employer instead of drained by them
Leaning on Support Systems
We all need people to lean on, whether it’s coworkers, friends, or a mentor. Having a trusted support system to talk things through helps keep stress from piling up. If you’re struggling, don’t tough it out alone.
Not sure who to turn to? A therapist can be the professional support you need when feeling stressed. Find a therapist that specializes in stress management here.
Work, Stress, and What Comes Next
Taking care of yourself isn’t just about feeling better…. it directly impacts how you show up at work and in life. By making self-care a priority, you can build a career that’s fulfilling, sustainable, and doesn’t leave you completely drained at the end of every day.
Bottom line: Your job is part of your life, but it shouldn’t consume your entire identity. Make space for the things that bring you joy and balance.
