Everyone knows that relationships can be tough at times. There are plenty of self-help books out there that promise to improve communication or decrease conflict, but how do you know which books you can trust? I recently surveyed numerous therapists all over the country at Ellie Mental Health, and they shared their go-to relationship books.
So whether you are casually dating, recently married, or well into a long-term partnership, check out these books and tips that our therapists recommend to their clients (and even to their own partners!).
Foundations of Healthy Relationships
These are the most-recommended books that our therapists shared! The following books go in-depth about what makes up a good foundation for relationships and how to improve (or recover) your bond.
The 7 Principles of Making Marriage Work by John Gottman and Nan Silver
What Makes Love Last by John Gottman and Nan Silver
Rekindling Desire by Barry and Emily McCarthy
How We Love by Milan Yerkovich and Kay Yerkovich
How to be a better communicator
Good communication is the backbone to any healthy relationship. When you have open and honest communication, you build trust, strengthen your emotional connection, and create the space where both partners can be themselves without fear of judgment. It’s the tool that helps you weather the storms, resolve conflicts, and celebrate your successes together. Whether you’re just starting a new chapter in your love story or looking to deepen an existing bond, get ready to discover why good communication is the backbone of any happy partnership with these books.
Eight Dates by John Gottman
The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
Hold Me Tight by Dr. Susan Johnson
The Dance of Connection by Harriet Lerner
We have a brand-new printable for you and your boo! Check out our conversation starters for your next date night here
Strategies to overcome challenges together or improve conflict in your relationship
Do you feel like you’re stuck in a conflict loop with your partner or dealing with the same challenges over and over? These books provide helpful tools around conflict resolution and improve communication together. Plus, #10 includes couples activities that can build deeper and stronger connections.
Rock the Boat by Resmaa Menakem, LICSW
Freaking the $#@% for Couples by Erin Pash, LMFT
Are you navigating or approaching divorce? Check out our recommendations for how to deal with divorce or uncoupling here: https://elliementalhealth.com/how-to-deal-with-divorce-10-helpful-books/
Remember that even the most enduring partnerships face their fair share of ups and downs. But armed with better communication skills and some handy strategies for dealing with challenges, you and your spouse can tackle anything that comes your way.